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Posts Tagged ‘esperanza’

Some times things are not the way they seem

and yet we are sure they are.

 

As a young man, or not yet a man but a boy,

I sat on the railing of a very high bridge.

my feet dangling

my eyes looking down the gorge.

 

The place I lived in seemed to be the entire world

and at the moment it was not a happy one.

 

The war hadn’t even begun for years to come

yet  inside me it was already there.

 

I thought about leaning forward and letting go.

Letting go of the thoughts that haunted me.

Letting go of my reality painfully pounding me.

And also,

letting go of life.

 

Looking back,

I don’t see why

I just did not take one step.

One step

out of my reality

to see that there is more to things than they seem.

 

Or that even though they are

the way they seem,

one step away,

one small step away,

another reality,

another adventure

is waiting.

 

 

 

I did not let go,

I just sat there

for hours

staring at the black river

making its way forward.

 

 

 

I left

with no money in my pocket

and a broken heart in my chest

to find goodness

in places and strangers I did not know.

 

I also found,

war

pain

hunger

sorrow

and things

I wish I did not see,

but

never

will I stop

flowing forward

from reality to reality

 

For what would life have been worth

had I let go of the railing

not having felt

pure

unselfish kindness

love

friendship

and

tiny moments of inner peace.

 

 

 

 

“If you are not living good,

I beg you, travel wide.

Said I am a living man

I’ve got work to do…”

Bob Marley – Soul Rebel

Mentally or physically, please step out of your reality and into another.

When you feel you can do nothing for yourself, do something for others.

Please do good.

You might find things weren’t the way they seemed.

 

 

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In my life I have indeed met some truly good people.

I come to think of it today since

I might have left a truly good woman

giving unconditional love.

 

Sometimes I feel there is something wrong with the world,

but hen I remember:

 

If we see good we don’t think that all is good.

When we see one thing or person being bad,

we generalize and many think that all persons or situations similar must be equally bad.

 

So why should not the opposite also be true?

You see one thing good = more things are good!

If it is, the world is not half as bad as I thought.

There is at least as much good as there is bad.

In fact the people that do good (uncoditionally) are many times not seen,

but they are there, among us everywhere.

Many of them are not older than they can show with their fingers.

 

I am talking about unconditional good

without any expectation of getting anything back at all:

 

leaving nice and comforting notes in a book at the library for a mother to be,

so called guerrilla goodness.

Or letting a refugee live in your house until ready to move on.

Or the unselfish goodness that happens when you most need it:

 

Some 18 years ago (before mobile phones and digital cameras)

I left my home in a hurry. Brokenhearted I spent my last money and flew to the other side of the world.

In the south of Mexico I chopped and cleared jungle for roads to pass,

people gave me food that was left over when restaurants closed,

poor families sharing what little food they had on trains that traveled so slow it took days to get where you were going.

Those were unselfish acts as well as the five Mariachis escorting me from parts of Mexico City in which I would not have lasted long.

Or the veterinarian taking me into his home, treating my typhoid fever for weeks without asking for nothing in return.

 

But above all

the little Zapotec boy

with torn clothes,

not a half man tall,

that just before nightfall

high up in the Oaxaca mountains

spent all his money

to pay the bus

for a skinny bearded long-haired-giant

a stranger

whom he had never met before

also giving me half his bread to eat

even though I did not understand a word of Chatino.

 

 

That is unconditional good

and

I have not forgotten you little hero

 

 

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Sometimes something that is a little bit bad can bring out something good.

A couple of 12/13-year-old-boys was teasing a girl at the school I teach. Not saying anything really bad, just teasing her, which is enough to make someone sad.

A few days later I spoke to one little boy and asked him if he knew why I wanted to talk to him. (He had just jumped on the teasing train as the last person, not really knowing what it was about).

His big eyes looked up on me like two huge question marks.

When he heard that a girl was sad and realized he had a part in it,

compassion, empathy and sadness filled the big brown eyes.

A small heart grew greater than his little body and was crying out.

With tears watering his eyes,

small almost silent words formed on his lips as he asked

“How can one make sadness go away when you have hurt someone?”

“We must find the girl so that I can apologize”

Sitting there I understood that I had just witnessed a small miracle. In that boys heart lies our future. And it can be a good one.

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